When you feel like you’re fighting an uphill battle, how do you find and keep your self confidence on a daily basis?
Maggie, owner of Revealed Studio, opens up and shares ways to gain and hold on to your self confidence.
Start with the Bunny Slope.
- 80% Attitude. Your attitude is a powerful tool in supporting your effort. Starting with “I can’t” or “not me” is self-sabotaging. Give yourself the chance with affirmative statements: “I got this” and “today, this is me.” If that’s too much, “I’ll try” or “I’m willing to” is a step in the right direction.
- True Friends. The law of attraction in physics states that “like attracts like.” Choose your tribe wisely. Unfortunately we’ve seen it more than we’d like: a client comes in with a friend, and instead being their cheerleader, the friend turns into someone more like a frenemy. They suck the good vibes right out of the air and not only is the client left feeling bad, but our whole team needs a big “shake it off” afterwards. Having a group of non-judgmental, positive friends will strengthen the foundation of your confidence, support it when it’s weak, and even help rebuild it when truly broken.
- Reflect on the Source. Is your self confidence coming from the superficial? It’s ok to feel gratitude for your body and even your appearance, but at the same time it’s important to remember it’ll only get you so far (and it’s not the most sustainable longterm). What about feeling confident in how you’re taking care of yourself? Being good to your body and your mind—well that’s something to really feel proud about. Across the board, when you look at pyramids ranking the hierarchy of needs in humans from Oprah, to Tony Robbins, to the late American psychologist Abraham Maslow, all place your physical form at the base of the pyramid. But it’s not so important how that physical form looks, but rather how your health enables your best, fullest self.Reflect on the source. Is your confidence coming from the superficial? It’s ok to feel gratitude for your body and even your appearance, but at the same time, it’s important to remember: those surface things only get you so far (and they’re not the most sustainable longterm). What about feeling confident in how you’re taking care of yourself? Being good to your body and your mind? That’s something to really feel proud about. Across the board, when you look at pyramids ranking the hierarchy of needs in humans from Oprah, to Tony Robbins, to the late American psychologist Abraham Maslow, all of them physical form at the bottom of the pyramid. In other words, it’s not so important how that physical form looks, but rather how your health enables your best, fullest self.
- Be Curious. It’s normal, and as a matter of fact, very common to be hard on yourself. On a daily basis we’re exposed to direct and indirect messages that can lead to self-doubt. Next time you feel that urge to cut yourself down rather than being judgmental, try being curious. For example, that’s interesting, every time I scan through instagram and see a woman with an awesome booty I start to spiral, committing to 100 squats a day till my flat butt grows an inch. What’s going on there? Is a bigger butt gonna make me happier? Is social media making me less secure? Try asking questions rather than immediately labeling yourself.
- You are beautiful & Unique. Comparing is a self-defeating monster. When we measure our worth alongside others, we fail to recognize the million tiny factors that make each and every one of us wholly unique and valuable in our own way. Try the curiosity trick again when you get the urge to compare. In doing so, your mind will open up. And here’s the truth: behind so many perfect-looking photos, there’s a level of smoke and mirrors worthy of a Las Vegas performance — photoshopped figures, strict dieting that by clinical standards would be considered an eating disorder, and a desperate need for affirmation that leads to addiction.
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